Jokes, quotes, games - Page 121

How do you call a Mexican spy? Agent GarCIA

Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Avenue.
Avenue who?
Avenue knocked on this door before?

How did Paul greet his friend?

"Give me Phi-lemon!”

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Styrofoam cup?
A dead baby doesn't harm the atmosphere when you burn it.

Yo mama's so old she used to babysit Jesus.

A guy is walking along the beach, when he sees a woman with no arms and no legs lying on the sand, crying.
He walks over to her and asks what's wrong.
"I've never been hugged before" she says.
Thinking this is a simple enough request, the man hugs her.
She soon starts crying again. He again asks what's wrong, and she replies, "I've never been kissed before."
The man again complies with her wishes and gives her a romantic kiss.
She starts crying again, and the man, slightly irritated, asks what's her problem.
"I've never been fucked before" she says.
So he picks her up and throws her in the ocean and says, "There, now you're fucked."

Why was math class so long?

The teacher kept going off on a tangent.

Why was Dumbo sad?

He felt irrelephant.

What’s is an Egyptian apple pie?

The kind mummy used to make.

Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom? Because she left the phone off the hook.