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Mom jokes

Why is a computer so smart? Because it listens to its motherboard.

Mom jokes

What’s the fastest land mammal? A toddler who’s been asked what’s in their mouth.

Mom jokes

After a long day, my favorite thing is to think of something for dinner that everyone will eat.” —No mother, ever

Mom jokes

I live in constant fear of having to share a "fun fact” about me.

Mom jokes

I love all my children equally. Except for the one who sleeps. I love that one more.

Mom jokes

I love my kids. Not enough to flip the chicken nuggets halfway through cooking, but I love them.

Mom jokes

Mom sleep: the state of rest where your eyes are closed but you can still hear everything your kids are doing.

Mom jokes

"Look at me, Mommy!” is the toddler equivalent of "Hold my beer.”

Mom jokes

What did Mommy spider say to baby spider? "You spend too much time on the web.”

Mom jokes

Science teacher: "When is the boiling point reached?” Student: "When my mother sees my report card!”

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