My wife's parents ran away from the
My wife's parents ran away from the cops after having a hefty argument. They're now my out-laws.
More jokes on Lawyer jokes
My wife accused me of being a terrible lawyer.
I couldn’t defend myself.
I couldn’t defend myself.
Lawyer: "Now that you have been acquitted, will you tell me truly: Did you steal the car?"
Client: "After hearing your amazing argument in court this morning. I’m beginning to think I didn’t."
Client: "After hearing your amazing argument in court this morning. I’m beginning to think I didn’t."
The trouble with the legal profession is that 98% of its members give the rest a bad name.
How can you tell if a lawyer is lying?
Other lawyers look interested.
Other lawyers look interested.
Why are there no Irish lawyers?
They can’t pass the bar.
They can’t pass the bar.
What’s the difference between a cat and a lawyer? One is an arrogant creature who will ignore you and treat you with contempt unless it can get something out of you. The other is a household pet.
Lawyer, speaking to a dog on trial for murder: "Who’s a good boy? "
Dog: "I am."
Lawyer: "Your honor, I rest my case."
Dog: "I am."
Lawyer: "Your honor, I rest my case."
A man asks his Solicitor: "If I give you £400, will you answer two questions for me?"
The solicitor replies: "Absolutely! What’s the second question?"
The solicitor replies: "Absolutely! What’s the second question?"
How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, they’d rather keep their clients in the dark.
None, they’d rather keep their clients in the dark.
The judge charged the attorney who killed her yoga instructor with pre-meditated murder.
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