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Lawyer, speaking to a dog on trial for

Lawyer, speaking to a dog on trial for murder: "Who’s a good boy? "

Dog: "I am."

Lawyer: "Your honor, I rest my case."

More jokes on Lawyer jokes

A man asks his Solicitor: "If I give you £400, will you answer two questions for me?"

The solicitor replies: "Absolutely! What’s the second question?"
How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they’d rather keep their clients in the dark.
The judge charged the attorney who killed her yoga instructor with pre-meditated murder.
A man walked into the local Chamber of Commerce of a small town, obviously desperate. Seeing a man at the counter, the stranger asks, "Is there a criminal attorney in town?” To which the man behind the counter immediately quipped, "Yeah, but we can’t prove it yet!”
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
When an attorney gets married, they don’t say, "I do.” They say, "I accept the terms and conditions."
Why won’t sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, how many orchards does it take to keep a lawyer away?
Do you know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
What do honest lawyers and UFOs have in common?

You always hear about them, but you never see them.