A toddler can do more in one
A toddler can do more in one unsupervised minute than most people can do in a day.
More jokes on Mom jokes
First baby: You start wearing maternity clothes as soon as the test is positive. Second baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. Third baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes.
I’m going to donate these bags of outgrown baby clothes to Goodwill. But first I’m going to drive around with them in my trunk for two months.
A friend asked me if she should have a baby after 40. I said no, 40 babies are enough.
New mom math: Being able to instantly calculate age by months, even after one year.
My kid sure talks a lot of crap for someone who still puts Crocs on the wrong feet.
Why is it that kids can repeat a swear word after hearing you say it once but still "don’t know how” to pick up their shoes despite seeing you do it a million times?
I expected to have to spend more time on things after having kids, but no one warned me about how many years of my life I’d lose waiting for them to get in and out of the car.